Log in

No account? Create an account
19 January 2011 @ 06:43 pm
Let me share with you a story.

Once upon a time, there was a wee tilty house at the edge of the forest. The man and woman who lived there were quite happy, even if he was a wee bit larger than life and radiated supreme confidence and she was a wee bit muffiny and fairly certain she was, all things considered, sort of lame.

It so happened that in a winter of many snows, yet another fell upon the tilty house and it’s long, lumpy driveway. It was followed by a freezing rain, which meant clearing that long driveway was going to be No Fun At All. The happy couple rose in the dark and early hours to free the man’s vehicle that he might make the long journey to work. “Just let nature take care of this,” he advised, gesturing down the driveway before climbing into his silver chariot which, it was worth noting, finally had the proper registration sticker so the man might stop getting tickets for it every freaking week. “It should be warm enough that this will melt.”

The woman heeded his advice insofar as she planned to let the main stretch of the driveway melt - or not - as the day went on. “I will simply clean the upper portion, where our chariots reside,” said she, and with ice chopper and shovel she went to work. Four times she ventured forth, and four times she pushed the ice back until at last, one could walk - and drive - without fear of sliding uncontrollably. But then she noticed the long stretch of the driveway was looking sort of crinkly. This might have been in part because the woman had sprinkled magical melting pellets over most of it, or it might have been the wonder of nature at work. Most like, it was both. Slight edge to the pellets.

Whatever the reason for the breakdown of the ice, the woman decided she was going to clear just a little bit of it away... just enough that the chariots - especially her wee blue conveyance - might have more traction.

An hour later, she looked up from her toil and lo! the entire driveway was clear!

She was pleased, at least until she realized the man was most certainly going to grouse at her for taking on such an arduous task instead of allowing nature to do the work. She considered her response, and when the best she could come up with was, “How did letting nature take care of your car’s registration work out?” she decided to simply smile and nod and hand the man a bowl of delicious veggie curry and let the rest sort itself out.

~*~The End~*~

Wasn’t that lovely?

Pictures to follow!
Zoë Tzoethor on January 20th, 2011 12:41 am (UTC)
Yet again you have made me literally lol while reading. It's not creepy if I print out your LJ and bind it, is it?
Kel: girlfriends version shaz & alexladyjoust on January 20th, 2011 01:09 am (UTC)
It's only creepy if I'm not grinning at the very thought. And I am. :)

Also, you are the driving force behind my niggling inclination to start a blog proper. Maybe. Perhaps. If I don't totally freak out and decide to hide behind the couch and snuggle HT instead.
Zoë Tzoethor on January 20th, 2011 01:18 am (UTC)
:) You would be an excellent blogger type person!
Ratesjul: brain spinningratesjul on January 20th, 2011 07:44 am (UTC)
I second this!
pheylanpheylan on January 20th, 2011 12:43 am (UTC)
Yay! I love storytime!

You could always respond with something along the lines of needing the exercise since you have been unable to run. He might accept that.

Or you could blame brownies.
Kel: Donna in the snowladyjoust on January 20th, 2011 01:13 am (UTC)

Funny thing - the reason I was so keen on digging out the upper driveway was that I wanted to clear a path to the 'gym' so I could run on the treadmill today... but I was so exhausted after all the shoveling I never set foot upon that beast.

And my mind immediately went to 'edible' brownies as opposed to 'wee helper type' brownies. Oh, you crazy monthly hormones!
pheylanpheylan on January 20th, 2011 01:35 am (UTC)
You could blame edible brownies, too. You want to burn off enough calories to justify baking and eating brownies. I think it's an excellent reward for all that work. After all, Nature won't eat them. Unless you count ants, which I refuse to do.
Annephloxyloxy on January 20th, 2011 02:37 am (UTC)
Delightful! :D

Also, I think working up a sweat and getting some upper body exercise is a plenty good excuse! And the one I'd use....since I'd already be thinking about how sore shoveling would make me. *is a wuss in general, not just when it comes to spicy food*
Fjordhopper: Doctor-smilefjordhopper on January 20th, 2011 10:46 am (UTC)
LOVE this story!! :)

Punch line is the best!!
izlziizlzi on January 20th, 2011 03:34 pm (UTC)
I love this! And I would love to read any novel you wrote, so get going with it!
Janet: heart facegoodnite_gracee on January 23rd, 2011 07:13 pm (UTC)
I DO love your writing (and that you are writing!). I read every word I come across!

And I would have used the registration comment, but I can be snarky that way...