November 9th, 2004

serious Oracle

two reasons why I'm a bit of an asshat

1. Spider in my office:

So, I was sitting here, working on my NaNovel (and when I say that, I do mean surfing the 'net pretending to do research), and on the wall of my deck-converted-to-office appeared a huge spider. HUGE. Not Australia-HUGE, but bigger than the first joint of my thumb HUGE. Naturally, squooshing it was out of the question. Don wasn't home, so it was up to me. After staring at it for a full two minutes (I swear, it was staring back!), I went to get a plastic cup and an envelope. I planned on scooping it into the cup, covering the opening with the envelope and carrying it outside, where it could live a full, happy life.

I put the cup over it. It shouldered it off. Then, it turned to look at me. Curling its lip in disdain, it scuttled rapidly away, all the while clearly demonstrating the skull-and-crossbones marking on its back.

Not five minutes ago, it showed up again. I went to turn on the light and grab the cup... and when I turned back, it was gone. And I'm no little bit freaked.

2. My stove:

Some of you may recall my railing against the gas stove that is in my kitchen. Only two burners work properly. A third works at about half-strength and the fourth does not work at all.

Well, the fourth burner does need some work. No biggie there, and no bad on my behalf. As for the weak burner? Heh. Funny thing... it's a simmer burner. Yeah. Designed for those long simmering dishes such as sooup, step, and sauces.

Funnier thing... it says it is a simmer burner on the front of the stove.

ay, me.