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27 September 2003 @ 09:14 pm
just need to spew a bit....  
I just need to get this off my chest, and this is the best place to do it. Don’t read if you’re likely to get angry and want to slap me for it. I know I really have no right to whinge, and I don’t want to sound like someone who is irking me no end on another site, but.... *sigh* watch me go!

I’ve worked pretty hard these last several months to shed the weight that the combination of quitting smoking and the march of time has packed onto my frame. I dropped about 30 pounds, and though I’m still shy of my college weight, I can live with that. I’ve changed my diet considerably, and try to make certain that I am drinking plenty of water.

Faire made things easy. I was too busy, no to mention too exhausted, to work out during the week, but the highly physical nature of my performance seemed to ensure that my metabolism was kept humming merrily along. Well, Faire is over now. The only performing I am doing is vocal in nature (if you don’t count dancing along). I’m trying to fit in workouts during the week - treadmill, some weights, crunches, stretching out - maybe every other day.

I performed at a fundraiser today, and I ate badly. I had bread. I had ziti. I had beer. Last night, I ate mashed potatoes with dinner. I had popcorn earlier in the day. Now, today, I’m all bloated and belly-full and mushy. I don’t think three bad meals would do this, but... I am just hoping that it’s PMS bloat. I am fervently hoping that it’s PMS hormones that are making me react so violently to this. I slugged back enough water today to make my eyeballs float in my head. When we came home, I got on the treadmill and pushed myself harder than I have in some time. I did a weight workout. And still, when I came upstairs and looked in the mirror, all I could see was a head resting atop huge hips and swelling belly. I KNOW this is probably skewed. I normally am all right with this, fairly cool even.

Please let it just be PMS. I don’t want to be like my friend who looks ill because she’s been so insane about her weight. I DO want my hard work to bear fruit, though. I want to be healthy and strong and slim.

I hate that this is worrying me so.

Now then. Slap me if you must. I rather feel like doing it myself.
I feel: crankycranky
I hear: 'Into the West' soundtrack
Ratesjulratesjul on September 28th, 2003 01:46 am (UTC)
No slapping. Only lots of hugging, because you are sweet and kind and wonderful and don't deserve slapping.